Unfortunately, this season has already been peppered with the sting of loss. One of my husband and my good friend's mom passed away two weeks ago. Aside from the fact that it was terribly difficult watching them go through that and that it brought back for me the personal sting of losing my mom eight years ago, it turned out that this was one of many incidents recently - and that is just between my co-workers and me. Since mid-November, my co-workers and I have had four funerals to attend. The news of such consistent loss across a very tiny cross-section of humanity struck a different chord than the one struck when someone every now and again says they lost someone.
Please don't misunderstand. I'm not negating the power of loss or the extreme upset any loss creates for a family. What I am stressing is that the quickness with which the numerous losses hit our tiny little group made me take a hard look at the reality of where my husband and I are.
We have a few goals: pay off the car, pay off my student loans, and I want to take him to Europe using our points for free airfare. In the longer term we'd like to move, maybe even customize our next place to really be what we want, and travel to a few places that have peaked our interest. I'd also like to donate to the Chicago Canine Rescue and build them a new facility - something they desperately need. With all that in mind, we keep debating how to best utilize our money - how much to save, how much to put towards loans, how much to put aside for our use, how much to use for donations, etc. Lately, we've been so focused on paying off our bills we have forgone a lot of 'things' - date nights, activities, etc - in favor of allocating funds better.
With the loss of these people and the quickness with which they passed, something inside me shook. I suddenly wondered what the rush was - why are we starving ourselves of enjoying life just to pay down a few bills a few months sooner? I thought back on the last 2 years, the last 5 years, looking at what warmed my heart, and you know what it was? Activities. Travels. Dinners and movie nights with my husband and friends. Those are what I remember. I don't remember the total of my bills for the month. I don't remember the intensity of the stress. I remember the people and the activity.
So, with that, we rethought. We aren't forgoing saving. We aren't forgoing donations. We aren't even forgoing paying our bills. What we have decided, though, is that starving ourselves of life's rich moments to pay something off a few weeks or months early may not be in our best interest. We have life insurance should something devastatingly horrible happen to us, so we have each other covered. Otherwise, in the end, it's the moments that make life so precious, not the $$ spent.
