Be More Feminine - Day 24

Failing.  So much.  Ugh!

Today I took action to finally clean up my nails, remove the old and chipping nail polish, and just put a clear coat on them to tidy them up.  However, this comes after a day of falling into all the old and bad habits.  A WHOLE DAY!  Guys, it was bad.  I was biting and picking and pulling and fiddling all day.  My nail polish was all chipped and two of my nails were back down to their shortest possible length - i.e. nubs.

My husband even caught me doing it and chided me for it.  In fact, he kept berating for the fact that I was ruining something I'd "spent perfectly good money on," and he had a point!  And I was happy and thankful that he brought my attention to it (like 20 times that day, granted), but he did.  However, the fact that he had to call me out on it bummed me out more! I've been so good this month and there I went throwing it all away in one day.  Actually it was more like minutes really.  It only takes a few seconds to ruin your nails, and I was mindlessly pulling at them all day.

The leftover remnants of yesterday's bad habits rolled into today.  I didn't pick or bite at my nails, but the hang nails started.  If you ever wonder why you get hang nails or frayed skin around your cuticles, it's because you pick at them and break their natural and neutral state.

Must. Get. Better.  Duly noted.

Be More Feminine - Day 19

What a great week!  Tuesday (the 18th) was my husband and my three year anniversary!  Woohoo!!  What a great feeling!

To celebrate, we decided to book reservations at Piccolo Sogno, and we decided to do it on a Monday, the 17th.  I have the pleasure of working from home on Mondays and I felt not only less guilty as a pet parent (having to crate my dog for a few hours at dinner only instead of all day and then another few hours for dinner) but also excited because Monday nights are far easier nights to get a reservation than Friday or Saturday.  And sure enough, they had a spot!

Well, on the 15th a friend and I had treated ourselves to mani/pedis, and my nails were (and still are, 4 days later!) on point!  Then, I made sure to give myself plenty of time to do my hair and makeup on Monday so they would look like perfection.  In addition, it was a beautiful 80 degrees so I could wear cute shoes, leggings, and a dressed up tunic for dinner.  Man, by the time 5:30 rolled around and it was time for me to head out to meet him for dinner, I looked so classy.

And then I stepped outside!  Apparently the Chicago wind doesn't disappoint because it was extremely gusty.  What did that mean?  All the effort put into my hair was semi for naught.

What did that teach me?  Perfection is an illusion.  Put in the effort to make yourself feel special and important, confident and secure, and the beauty will follow.  But if you're working completely on making sure your exterior is infallible, well, you'll never be satisfied.

And so I went to dinner, hair windblown and all.  And you know what? My husband still looked at me with doting eyes and said I looked so beautiful.  ...what a good man.  ;-)

Be More Feminine - Day 7

Yesterday my boss noticed my nails were done.  And then today I noticed my nail polish was chipping.  These are things to which I never paid attention before, because, quite frankly, I never had my nails done.  On the flip side, however, I am picking at my nails far less than before, though the habit isn't waning.  I'm simply noticing and making myself quit more often.  :)

On a different note, tomorrow I get my hair cut.  To be honest, I'm terrified.  Having not had much luck in that department in the past, I'm quite nervous.  There is a part of me, though, that is excited.  Change.  Change is good.  Change pushes you.  Change grows you.  And luckily, in this department, it can always grow back!

Be More Feminine - Day 5

So this month is all about me more "femme", as the French say.  I want to find a way to be prouder of my femininity and appearance.  I believe that I haven't looked haggard or disheveled, but I do believe I can be more polished and chic.  As a result, I want to take the month to work on that.

Here is what this month is NOT:

• Harping on my weight
• Believing that I am not beauty
• Believing that I am not worthy
• Having everything perfect
• Dressing "to the 9s" everyday

Instead, here are the things I decided to focus on:

• Stop picking/biting my nails
• Have them polished at all times, or (as polish chips) shaped and well groomed
• Put effort into my hair so it's not "just in a ponytail" which has become my new staple on work days
• Choosing clothing that is truly an outfit / goes together, not just whatever is closest or looks 'just ok'.  
• Wear jewelry that creates a "finish" to the look.

So far we are on day 6.  I had told my husband that this month includes getting a haircut and he asked if I was going to change it up or keep it the same.  I said I wanted to change it up, maybe go short, like, chin length, and he responded with a resounding, "Oh thank God!" which I took as the OK to try something very different.  That is coming on the 8th, so I'll keep you posted!  (It will also require me to put more actual effort into my hair since I can't pull it back in a pony!!)

I've also now painted my nails twice and my toes once.  The first go around took a while to trim everything and clean up the cuticles, but I will admit that looking at them over the last 6 days has brought me a giddy sense of delight.  Having my nails done when I was younger was always a treat, so seeing them done now brings me emotionally back to that teenage 'nod' to a job well done or a special time to celebrate.  That's pretty cool.

I've also have always been sure to leave the house with at least eyeliner, lipstick, and gloss on.  Admittedly, that also has made me feel more polished and refined.  All in all, I think this is going to be a "bon" month!!