Relationship Advice Sources

Have you ever vented to someone about relationship problems?  Of course!  We all have!  We've probably run to a friend or a co-worker and said "OMG.  You'll never believe what ______ did?" or "I'm so mad that s/he _______".

If you're a woman, you do it because you need to vent.  You need to get it off your chest and out into the universe so that it won't fester inside you.  That seems pretty normal too!  However, you have to remember to be careful.  Maybe you only vent to this co-worker.  How do you think they view your significant other?  Pretty badly, because that's all they hear!  So, part (1) is to remember that every time you say something about your other half, good or bad, that is how that person will always view him or her.  How do you want others to view your husband or wife?

I don't mean to create this ideal person who doesn't really exist because you only ever say the positive things or you pick and choose to create this story that isn't real.  But what I do mean is that he or she isn't there, only the stories you tell are, so heed how you speak about him or her.  Would you want to be negatively viewed by someone you had never met because your significant other only ever vented about you?

Part (2) is where you gain advice.  Let's say you are venting, because, after all, that's pretty normal.  Do you want advice?  If you don't BE SURE TO SAY THAT because everyone will think they have the "perfect" advice for you!  Suddenly you'll be bombarded with absolutely ludicrous "fixes".  If you DO want advice (because, let's face it, usually the venting is b/c we don't know what to do or what we're doing isn't working), be careful who you vent to.  If you want advice, here's the thought to always live by:

Only take advice from people whose ______________ you admire or wish to have.


Would you take financial advice from a broke person?  Of course not!! (but guess how many times you have!....think about that one)

So why would you take advice from someone who's relationship you don't admire or wish to emulate?  You shouldn't.

So next time you feel frustrated about something at home, remember pieces 1 & 2.  And I'm not fully advocating that you should hold things in, but what you speak about is what magnifies.  Do you really want this 'issue' to amplify?  If you don't, then why would you speak about it all day long?  Just be careful.  You deserve the best relationship.