Regret-ing Forward

I'm not one for regrets.  I'm not crazy or wild, but I've always worked to live by the belief that there shouldn't be moments that I would regret, and if I come to a juncture where a decision to act might be scary I ask myself, "Would I regret not____?"  If the answer to that question is 'yes', I usually just do it.

However, and while I don't have many, there are still a few things I might have done over.  Now, I also run on the belief that if you listen to your inner compass and put forth the effort, what is meant to be will be.  For example, I never went skydiving and I think it would be amazing to go.  That said, I tried 3 times in college to go, and each time I signed up, the day of the jump the event was cancelled due to weather.  Over 3 years I tried to go 3 different times, and with every one being turned down, I have since understood that that was God's way of saying I am not supposed to jump out of a plane.  Fine. I'm sad to have never gone, but that is a scenario where I repeatedly put forth the effort but it was not a card I was ultimately to play.

There are a few others, a few items and events I would have liked to have done differently, a few things I would have liked to have told people but didn't and now I wish I had.  Ultimately, I can probably count all those times on 1 hand which, in the grand scheme of things, is quite remarkable.  I highly recommend you live your life that way so you can't say 'if only I'd...." and rattle off countless items.  However, with Adele's new song, "Hello," on the radio (which, by the way I love!...be still my thoughtful and wallowing heart), I am reminded of those less-than-handful of things I didn't try hard enough on.  And to my younger self, I say, "I'm sorry".  I'm sorry I didn't stay in Spain longer when I had the chance; I'm sorry I didn't get believe you were beautiful enough at a young enough age to keep you healthy through your teen years; I'm sorry I didn't make the effort to learn a new language when I had the perfect chance in school.

In the words of my book, Living With B, "Hindsight is a gift, not a given."  So here's to hoping my now 20/20 vision keeps my heart adventurous and my nerve yearning to "do" so I can continue to keep my regrets to only one hand.