Wednesday, May 25, 2011

My Dear Grandma...

This week I attended my Grandmother's funeral.  It was awful and wonderful at the same time.  I'll explain.


Grandmas are wonderful people.  They light up a room and make you feel like you can take on the moon and the sun all at the same time.  They're your biggest supporters and loudest cheering sections...and biggest candy suppliers.  :-)  Unfortunately my grandmother died of colon cancer, and, although I did know it was coming, it was still not easy.  Luckily, I saw her on a Tuesday, and she died early Saturday morning.  It was eerie, because she knew she was dying.  I saw her Tuesday as I was leaving Wednesday for a trip for three days and wouldn't see her on her birthday.  Knowing I'm heading to Greece soon, she said "In case I don't see you, have fun in Greece."  Thinking she misunderstood I would be home by Saturday, I explained I would see her soon and she said "no, no, if I don't see you, have fun in Greece."  Right then I knew, so the phone call (or text) was no surprise.  The rest of the experience had it's moments.


First off, Adolf's funeral home is amazing.  Originally in Berwyn, the newest location is in Willowbrook off Plainfield and Madison.  It's only five years old and absolutely beautiful.  They have a gorgeous kitchen for coffee and families to fill with all kinds of non-nutritional treats!  The home is wonderful and the staff phenomenal.  I would recommend them to anyone. 


The actual wake and funeral were extremely trying.  I know my grandma is my grandma, but although I was sad to lose her, she was older already and people can't live forever.  The hardest part, however, was watching my grandfather break down.  I've rarely seen the man cry in my entire life and watch him sob uncontrollably as he said goodbye to his wife of 63 years and best friend for longer broke something inside me.  My eyes seemed to be perpetually red.  The worst, though, was the actual burial.  I knew we'd be going to cemetery (and I hate cemeteries), but I didn't know she was going to be buried right next to my mother.  Any shred of composure I held up to the burial was lost.  I sobbed uncontrollably almost the entire time I was on the grounds.  


Also, side note #1, people need to not be so dumb during funeral processions.  We have flashing lights, bright orange stickers, and drive at 5 miles an hour for a reason.  Do not try to pull in front of us or pass through the middle of our procession.  There actually exists the chance that the person behind the wheel is in agony and even sobbing uncontrollably.  You are just asking to get hit.  Also, side note #2, when people park on both sides of the cemetery drive because they are currently burying someone and have therefore taken up most of the drive, Do Not Try To Pull Through The Parked Cars.  Dear man who came less than and inch from hitting my bumper, I stand by what I said.  There is no way you are in a cemetery and actually in enough of a hurry that you had to try to maneuver through our parked chaos and not gone out the opposite direction.


Luckily, though, and back to the real issue, my family is amazing and finds a way to break the teary occasion with joy and laughter.  Yes, I laughed during the wake and funeral luncheon.  (Lunch, by the way, is always a necessity after such draining experiences.  Free food and drinks?  Yes please.  Funerals require replenishing of energy.)  During the days, however, we told stories about Grandma, had a "memory table" where we wrote things we remembered about her.  Some included that she was the best to watch scary movies with, she always stole rolls, butter, and jam from restaurants saying, "They're just going to throw them away!", she always wore a blue mu'umu'u around the house, she prided herself on her spoon collection from all the places she'd been around the world, she always hid candy in her purse for us to find when we visited, and she was always always happy when she answered the phone.  She was an amazing woman and I will miss her dearly.


So, in short, although trying, draining, and overall exhausting though the experience was, it was a wonderful few days.  Thank you to Bohemian Crystal for the wonderful food, Adolf's for the gorgeous accommodations, and my family for being so amazing.  We will miss you, Grandma.

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