Saturday, April 19, 2025

AOT: Consulting Architects and Builders

Okay, confession time - one of my dream jobs would be to consult for architects and builders on what layouts do and do not make sense.  So, if any of you out there need a sounding board, my fee is reasonable!  I'd love to help!  Just message me (email in the about page).

I initially went to school for architecture because I wanted to build homes.  Genuinely.  But I realized the amount of schooling and the income proposed for new architects and what I wanted out of my life didn't match (worked out too, because I graduated during the 2007/8 recession and it would have been a nightmare).

Still, I have loved homes and we've built a semi custom house and redone two other place.  I find it so fun.  And I'm good at it.  So much so that my standards are super high and every time we talk through a house (because we enjoy spending our weekends touring open houses to see what's out there, what's new, what's trending, and what people are doing) all I do is critique.  Most of the time it starts with "What they should have done is...."  This is for anything from $300K to $2M. There's always something the builder or renovator did that makes no sense.  A little extra though or a twinge extra cash to do something more appropriately would have made all the difference.

So, who knows?  Maybe someone wants a little extra help, and I can be that for them!  But I do think builders, architects, and renovators need to be more thoughtful about how folks actually use spaces and not just what may or may not fit on paper.

Now, to go look at some more open houses!

Friday, April 18, 2025

LMOH: Sample reading of What Ein Prefers

It's official!  After an ask from a reader to have a sample of the story on YouTube so she could show folks who have difficulty reading but who would enjoy the story, I have posted the first 1/3 of the book on YouTube for your introduction and enjoyment!


Enjoy!  And if you love it, grab a copy through Amazon or Etsy (www.lastbitepublishing.com) has the links!  Remember, a portion of proceeds go to local animal rescues.



 

Friday, April 11, 2025

LMOH: Coffee

I know lots of people wake up to coffee.  Sometimes it's a need.  Sometimes it's a desire.  Sometimes it's both.  Regardless of the driver, there is something magical about the smell of coffee and the taste of it, bursting with rich and bitter flavor on your tongue all at the same time.

Over the past year I've actually gotten away from caffeine and come to find that I truly love coffee for coffee's sake, and usually black.  Rarely do I do lattes or cappuccinos anymore, but they can have a special place in my day when I need something a little more filling.  But at home, it's Kcups during the week (or drip if I'm feeling up to it) and Nespresso on weekends.  One of our friends has a machine to make your own espresso, and I think that's super special!  It was fun when we visited, but I don't have the patience or the time to clean up after it.  So Nespresso it is!  Still, pushing that button, hearing it brew, smelling it as it falls, and then finally taking the warm cup in my hands....mmmm...nothing says a happy morning like a fresh cup of coffee.

Enjoy!

Wednesday, March 12, 2025

LMOH: Warm Sunshine

I may be opposed to changing the clocks 2x a year, but I do enjoy how around this time of year the sun's warmth really starts to grow.  There's something both magical and calming about being in the sunshine and feeling your body warm up.  It's like an invisible hug, and when you're cold or when your life feels a little overwhelming and like you're swirling, that first moment of warmth hugging your body immediately makes me sigh, smile, and remember that there are bigger and better things out there.

LMK what your little moment of magic looks like as spring arrives in the northern hemisphere and fall begins in the southern!

Monday, March 3, 2025

AOT: Opinion - HOAs

 My whole adult life I’ve lived in an HOA community.  I’m now on my fourth, though my third as a participating and paying adult (my first was as a high school and then college person with her family).  The longer I’m in an HOA the more I wish HOAs were managed by the city with 1 (maybe 2, based on size) reps elected by the community to represent the community in the city board.  Why?  The main reason:  Consistency.

Our first HOA as an adult was as a couple - one of seven units in the building.  It landed on us to manage and we had to hunt down dues at times, try to get lawyers involved, and as a 26yo, why were we in the position doing that?  We also realized while we’re incredibly responsible, not everyone is, and I didn’t trust my money with any other neighbor, and we were tired of fighting the neighbors for basic HOA compliance.  So we agreed to go big! Big community where we didn’t have to be involved.

After 5 years in a 6-building and hundreds-of-people complex, we weren’t opposed to HOAs but each building had such different dilemmas hearing people complain at meetings was exhausting.  They never saw the community as a whole and only looked at their individual, myopic view.  And we found that odd.  Home value is based on the whole area not just one home, so why wouldn’t you want to consider everyone?

So when we moved states we thought maybe we’d get away from them, but we ended in another one as they’re incredibly common in our current city.  We’ve looked at some homes over the years in this area and some have private roads for only 4 people, or retaining ponds or walls for under 10.  And when we ask the realtors they’re like , “oh, you’ll just manage it with your neighbors” like it’s no big deal.  My husband and I flash back to those 7-unit days, shudder and exit as quickly as possible.

But even in my community people still argue over the big and small, some thinking about the whole and some only about their small portion where their home is.  Some talk about how we’re better than other communities and others how were worse.  Some about how maintenance things should be picked up by the city and others about how we’re not keeping up enough with the city.

And that’s when I started wondering why HOAs aren’t managed by the city.  Cities already have rules about behavior and what is and isn’t allowed.  And if you like an area / town it probably has something to do with those overall rules.  But if HOAs were managed by the town, there would be a potential for more consistency - a 20-30 year plan and schedule for when roofs and siding would get replaced, which codes have to be followed, and if something were out of code it’s not a debate between neighbors about “if” because the city would dictate “when”.  And by having a rep from the community the city could think about the nuance of the project and needs - if your balconies are crumbling maybe part of the debate could be allowing your neighbors to elect which payment plan they prefer; which color they prefer for the paint, etc.  if you dislike something, go to your city rep or write or call the actual city board.  It would stop putting neighbors against one another, and it would put maintaining a standard at the city level.  It might even reduce the number of HOAs because cities would already oversee enough that new communities wouldn’t be incentivised to privatise the group of homes.

All that said, I see all the arguments for having an HOA for the community and have it separate from the city - tighter consistency, possibly more potential in your voice being heard if there’s a problem…but I also challenge you to look at listings on Zillow in HOA rich communities and see how many say “No HOA!!!” …with often more than 1 exclamation point.  

It’s just interesting.  The give and take and the perspective changes that occur as you live and grow in different locations.  We all hope for the best.

Friday, February 14, 2025

LMOH: Valentine's Day

Happy Day of Love to everyone.  This isn't how the day was always celebrated, as it has quite a mysterious past (Roman? Christian? Something else entirely?). But whether you think of it as a day of love, fertility, or something different, there's no denying into today's world, it has a definitive moment.

That said, not everyone approaches Valentine's Day with joy.  Years where I didn't have a Valentine, I just wanted this day to pass by quickly.  Now that I do, we've worked really hard to keep it low key and unassuming, exchanging only cards and a kiss.  We treat each other to gifts on birthdays and then big gifts we need or want become "multi event gifts" (e.g. anniversary + Xmas, etc).  Why?  Historically money - we've been frugal and focused heavily on savings, so we, instead, stretch a gift that's bigger and meaningful across many events and work to make days like today small, focused, more about just being together and enjoying a special cup of coffee or takeout and a movie instead of adding another big event into the year.

But Valentine's Day doesn't just have to be about the partner in your life.  And that's where this day can be truly beautiful.  Make a friend or family member feel special with a card or phone call. Maybe even a surprise cup of coffee.  Have a dog or cat? Give them a big hug and snuggle tightly, because to them, every day is Valentine's Day, as you are the most important thing in their whole world.  

The point is, don't buy into the commercial nature of the day to find your joy and validation.  You're enough as you are, and sharing love doesn't take money.  It takes a smile, a little bit of time, and something that shows you recognize another.  

Happy Valentine's Day!  *hugs*

Thursday, January 23, 2025

AOT: Broke in Your 30s vs Your 20s

I brought this up with my husband the other day, and then more recently with my friends who all seemed to echo similar sentiments.  I'm approaching 40, and as I think back on my 20s and 30s, one thing seemed odd to me in a way I hadn't anticipated.  I've always been prone to stressing about my finances, every since my mom died and we were thrown into the very real pool of being incredibly broke without her income and with her medical (and other) bills to pay off.  It happened when I was 21 and ever since then you could almost say I've been hyper vigilant about staying out of debt and above water since then.  Yes, there is some debt I had to undertake (student loans, mortgage) but my husband and I steer clear of other debt like CC debt, the kind that comes with an interest rate.  Even my student loans were a beast to pay off.

So as we were walking the other day I looked at him and said, "You know, it's funny.  I thought my 30s would be awesome because we'd 'have more money and freedom,' but like, no.  I'm not broke like I was in my 20s, but I'm broke in a new way, in an 'I'm trying to save for the future and not go into debt while also not living on ramen and saltines only and everyday' kind of way, and it's utterly exhausting."

To my surprise, he and my friends have all echoed similar scenarios back.  Yes, compound that with COVID in 2020 and a slew of other mishaps that peppered the last two decades for millennials, and it almost seems odd that we would have or should have expected anything else.  But between trying to plan for a retirement that may or may not exist and may or may not include social security, pay off student debt which feels like digging yourself out of quicksand, and for some of my friends looking at raising kids and/or going through divorce, and/or losing parents and paying estate fees and attorney fees and moving fees...it's all quite berating.  It makes me realize I should give myself and other people within a decade of my age more grace to feel numb or annoyed or frustrated or, or or...more often.  

Anyway, I hope you're finding things are going well for you, but if you feel like you're spinning in a vortex of Groundhog's Day (like the movie) and wondering when your bank account will read a number that makes you think "hey, I could splurge and not be at zero!", just know you're not alone.  Wishing you some peace in what's started as a very chaotic year as well.

Friday, January 17, 2025

LMOH: Long Weekend Vibes

 Mmmm, waking up today and realizing a long weekend is ahead is one of the best feelings.  I already love waking up on Fridays because it means it's "special coffee" day (aka we save our Nespresso for the weekends based on a long tradition of making Fridays and weekends special).  And then waking up AND realizing that on top of Special Coffee Friday it's also going to be a long weekend?!  Hello, happiness!

What special things do you have planned (or enjoy doing) on long weekends?

Friday, January 10, 2025

Food: Chicken Wings FTW

So, for the holidays we had a houseful of 7 for 6 days.  I had a lot to make so one day I just got a bunch of chicken wings to bake.  Yes bake.  And they were a HUGE hit.  Everyone kept asking what I did because they tasted great, and one of the people at the house, like me, doesn't love when chicken wings are dipped or slathered in sauce.  We like them simple and yummy.

Now, the recipe seems too simple, but I promise if you bake them long enough, they taste fantastic!

Ingredients:

- Chicken wings

- Salt


Instructions:

- Preheat oven to 425

- Lay chicken wings skin side up on a pan (which I also covered in parchment paper because it makes for easier clean up, but that's your call)

- Sprinkle salt on the top of all chicken wings

- Put in oven for 40 min

- At 40 min, pull them out of the oven and with tongs flip them all over so the skin side is facing down, then flip them back over so the skin side is facing up 

        - I usually go from one side of the pan flipping them over (e.g. left to right) and then back the same way again (e.g. left to right)

        - This is essentially a "quick baste" - it gets some of the juices that have seeped off them back onto the skin to create a crispiness.  No waiting, this whole process should take like 2-3 minutes.

- Place back in oven for 20 more minutes

- Remove and enjoy at the temperature you prefer (I usually have to let mine sit for ~5 min to cool a bit)



Simple.  But amazing!  Enjoy!

Wednesday, January 1, 2025

LMOH: Ringing in the New Year

 Happy New Year!  If you’re like me you’ve approached this new year with a little trepidation.  Last year was a lot and while there were some high points for sure, I just find I’m not (to date myself here) “psyched” about celebrating as I used to be.  

That said, I awoke this morning feeling happy and light.  Then I stepped outside into a clear, brisk, and refreshing morning as I let the dogs out.  Then I found my foster, Jet, and our dog, Faye, playing together (which is a rare occurrence - Faye is a corgi and corgi legs are short so Jet, in trying to play, usually swipes her with his long legs and she gets annoyed, so they don’t play much).  But there they were, happy and playing, and I found it warmed my heart.

So who knows?  Maybe this will be an excellent year.  For all of us.